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i can still feel your hand in mine; your warm breath on the back of my neck as you held my head against your shoulder; itches, from your hair, on my cheek.

i wish you were still here. 

i haven’t been feeling like myself for the past couple days. i’m happy things have gotten better tonight but i can’t wait to become better too. 

you’re supposed to be happy. i just want you to be happy. it’s painful seeing you like this. i’m so sorry. 

currently trying to be the strong one. but it’s coming at me from all sorts of angles and directions. and i can’t expect you to be here for me the way i need it most.

she’s gone again, with the car. just like she left when we had all sat down for dinner last night. i guess what we feel doesn’t matter. 

i woke up from a bad dream, where my dinner order came out as a few strands of pasta with one being orange in colour. i think it was shrimp flavoured. i also got captured and somehow killed on a bus. they were letting a person go each stop, but when it got to mine, they killed me instead. but even after they killed me, i was alive.